Life Lessins Blog

A Problem of Presentation

Writing is one of those endeavors that makes us aware of the difference between ideas and their presentation. Putting pen to paper (or finger to keyboard) immediately generates two considerations: “What point do I wish to convey?” and “How am I going to convey it?” These questions pull our minds in different directions – the […]

Reflections on Shavuot: The Torah’s Voice

We just observed the holiday of Shavuot, the day that we relive our encounter with Hashem’s voice emanating from atop Har Sinai. Hearing the voice of Hashem en masse was a singular event in our nation’s history, one that shaped our collective identity by granting us the opportunity to experience Hashem’s communication to us firsthand. […]

The Imprisonment of Reactivity

Most of us were raised on the value of self-determination, the principle that we are in control of our lives and free to shape our own destiny. This precept is deeply embedded in our collective conscience and serves as a core tenant in both Western and Jewish philosophy (see Rambam Hilchot Teshuva chapter 5). We […]

Pesach: A Cure for Loneliness

Loneliness is on the rise in our society. Since the outbreak of Covid-19, reports of loneliness have skyrocketed, with 1 in 3 Americans, and over 60% of young adults, having felt “seriously lonely” over the past year. According to one study, 3 in 5 people report feeling left out, poorly understood, or lacking companionship since […]

Self-Acceptance (Part Four)

Let’s pull together what we’ve learned about acceptance for a fourth and final installment: learning to accept ourselves. To many of the young people I work with, the words “self-acceptance” sound short for “the way you are now is the way you are going to stay, and you need to be ok with that.” This […]

Non-Acceptance: The Change-Mission (Part Two)

We’ve defined acceptance in marriage as meeting our spouse exactly where they are, being willing to hear where they’re coming from, and working together from that point. Unfortunately, many of us have spent a lot of time, effort, and heartache doing exactly the opposite. Not only are we poor at executing the task of acceptance, […]

Busyness: An Obstacle to Holding Space

We’ve seen that among the ingredients necessary to hold space for our emotions, time and presence are near the top of the list. Holding a feeling requires us to pause and dedicate some of our attentional resources to “being with” our internal experience.  Yet it seems like time is harder than ever to come by. […]

Holding Space (Part One)

We know a lot about how emotions work. The rules of emotional physics tell us that just as the physical world abides by established parameters, such as gravity, the law of inertia, and cause and effect, so too there are definite principles that govern how emotions operate. What Do We Know About Emotional Physics? The […]